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I’m spotted in Seattle. Sort of. September 28, 2007

Posted by Niels in : Beauty and the Geek, Personal , 12 comments

At a bar in Seattle:

Her: Hey, this is silly, but can I ask you something?
Me: Sure.
Her: My friend thinks you’re the guy from Beauty and the Geek.
Me: Now why would she say that?
Her: So you’re not?
Me: No, I am.
Her: You’re full of shit! (walks away)

Your thoughts?

Beauty and the Geek is back! July 18, 2007

Posted by Niels in : Beauty and the Geek, Personal , 9 comments

Apparently Season 3 of Beauty and the Geek is into reruns. Hello to any new viewers. I got bored writing about dating and social dynamics so now I mostly write about stuff I want to remember fifty years from now. So mostly I write about myself.

No naked photos here, either. But maybe you’ll get lucky next week. You should keep reading, just in case.

Your thoughts?

My interview in Kiplinger’s Personal finance June 20, 2007

Posted by Niels in : Beauty and the Geek, Dating coach, Magazine, Personal , 2 comments

Kiplinger Personal Finance magazine profiled me in this month’s issue. Unfortunately, all you can get online is the blurb: “From Engineering Geek to Dating Coach: A PhD student in electrical engineering changes direction after a stint on the reality TV show Beauty and the Geek.” But if you swing by your local bookstore, you can check me out on the last page of the July 2007 issue. I do have to say, it was a great experience working with a photographer who was working to make me look cool rather than geeky.

Your thoughts?

To win or Toulouse: Working the room when you don’t speak the language June 18, 2007

Posted by Niels in : Beauty and the Geek, Dating coach, How to, Personal , 4 comments

I had a fantastic time in Toulouse. It feels smaller than any big city I’ve ever been in. I spent a few days wandering around downtown Toulouse with a former student and never would have guessed that it’s the fourth-largest city in France (behind Paris, Lyon, and Marseilles, just so you know).

My last night was the most fun. A nice dinner (Oh God, baked Camembert with fig is so good. And so is duck - aguillettes de canard, ou magrete de canard… mmm…), followed by a meeting with the “Toulousian Artists’ Club”. I met ten pretty cool guys (only a few of whom spoke English, so it was interesting), all working to become more comfortable in social settings and more successful with women. We talked for a while and everyone wanted to hear my take on the process. They’ve been reading a lot of community stuff - magic tricks and routines and all that jazz, and most of them were really receptive to the idea that there is another way. I enjoyed having such an enthusiastic audience - it’s nice to be appreciated.

Afterwards a few of us went out to a French bar. I’ve never worked a room in another language, but I think I figured it out. Lots of expressiveness, lots of facial expression, and an enthusiastic, “Bonsoir! Hello!” to everyone in the room did the trick. This evening was a personal achievement for me as well, since I’ve been nervous about talking to strangers who don’t speak my language. I don’t want to be the obnoxious American who assumes everyone speaks English, but at the same time - je ne peux pas bien parler francais.

The evening went incredibly well, though. I’d say about 1 in 10 people spoke English, but since they were all in groups, about half the groups I approached had at least one person who would react really well and engage me in conversation. I had girls laughing and touching me, guys buying me drinks, and I was even recognized by some French fans of Beauty and the Geek (they watched it over the internet). Seriously, what are the odds?

So, moral of the story:
1) Fun, friendliness, and body language translate, even if your words don’t.
2) “Hello!” and “I don’t really speak French!” are the only phrases you need to know
3) One day, I will pick up a girl whose language I do not speak at all. And it will be hot.

Photos soon…

Your thoughts?

My first post-Beauty and the Geek photoshoot May 10, 2007

Posted by Niels in : Beauty and the Geek, Personal , 4 comments

I did a photoshoot yesterday for an upcoming magazine interview. We shot a few rolls by the electrical engineering building on the UC Berkeley campus, where I was mobbed by freshmen girls, and a few rolls in a local bar, where I was not. I felt a little self-conscious working it for the camera in the middle of the day in a very public place. I wonder how many photoshoots you have to do before that goes away.

I have to say that the photoshoot is a somewhat more positive experience when the photographer is trying to make you look cool, rather than as geeky as possible.

Your thoughts?