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On losing a friend September 30, 2006

Posted by Niels in : Personal , 1 comment so far

A friend of mine was killed yesterday in a tragic car accident.  It feels really strange.  Being halfway across the country, I’m so far removed from it that it doesn’t feel real.  I heard about the accident through email, read the news online, and was on the phone with friends most of the morning.

I don’t really know what to feel.  When I first heard, I mostly felt numb, which alternated with sadness throughout the day.  And I feel so helpless.  What can I do?  Flowers are such a pathetic gesture.  So I just spread the word to other friends who hadn’t heard the news yet.

After work, I went out and surrounded myself with friends.  Most of my other friends don’t know what happened, and I didn’t want to talk about it with them.  I’m doing my best to keep myself in a happy place this weekend, and we’ll see what happens on Monday when I’m back in my apartment alone.

Perhaps the saddest moment was looking at my friend’s Facebook profile and seeing all the messages people have left.  It seems like no one can believe it yet, but there are lot of people who will be missing him.

Your thoughts?

I walk around naked and fart noisily September 27, 2006

Posted by Niels in : Personal , 5 comments

It’s nice having your own place.

Your thoughts?

So much relationship potential September 25, 2006

Posted by Niels in : Dating coach, Personal , 3 comments

A year ago I didn’t believe it was possible to learn to attract women.  Then Art of Attraction taught me to be more attractive and my whole world changed.  And at the time I thought attraction was my only problem - that I was good at “small talk”, “normal conversation”, and connecting with people.  The material in Art of Rapport changed my mind there.  “Oh my God,” I thought, “I’m so emotionally walled off.  I need to fix this, too.”  So I did.  And all my relationships changed.

And up until this weekend, I thought I was pretty good at relationships.  Certainly, I’m far, far above average.  I’ve been pretty happy in my relationships, the girls I’ve dated have been pretty happy, and I’ve never had a bad breakup.

But this weekend’s workshop blew my mind.  Now that I have an understanding of what’s possible in a relationship, I feel so inadequate.  I have the ability to make the girls I date so much happier than I have been.  Someday, I’ll look back on my relationships and see a clearcut distinction between my pre-workshop relationships and my post-workshops relationships.  Once again, my whole worldview has shifted.

The sad part is that now that I see how easy it is to make a woman happier than she’s ever been, I look around and see that no one else knows how to do it.  Passion evaporating after 10 years of marriage is “normal”.  My friends will have ok relationships.  My sister will have an ok relationship.  But not great.  In fact, I think that most people, when presented with how happy two people can be in a long-term relationship, would simply refuse to accept it.  It would be too painful to accept that a relationship that much stronger than theirs could exist.

I took nearly 70 pages of notes this weekend.  I’m not even typing coherently right now.  My mind has been blown.

Your thoughts?

I’m so excited! September 22, 2006

Posted by Niels in : Personal , 2 comments

I’m going to San Francisco!  I’m going to see old friends!  I’m going to attend a workshop and learn relationship skills I never even dreamed about!  I’m going to do enough coaching to pay for the entire plane flight!  I’m going to pitch my magazine!

Life is so good.

Your thoughts?

I need a lawyer! September 20, 2006

Posted by Niels in : Magazine , 3 comments

I need a lawyer!  Or an attorney, or at least someone who can tell me what the difference between the two is.

The magazine plan is still chugging along, and we know we need some legal advice.  But we don’t know enough to know why.  So we need an attorney familiar enough with the magazine business to tell us why we need him.  I know there will be copyright issues and contracts when we purchase content, but what else, I can only guess.  I think I’ve got the incorporating process mostly figured out, but I’ve got a few questions on that, too.

Now that half the world can track me through the facebook mini-feed, I’m hoping for some prompt assistance.  If you’re stalking me and you’ve spent some time in law school, or just know someone who has, please help me network a bit.

Your thoughts?